I know it seems like I'm letting off a lot of steam lately...
(sorry)
Try not to judge. I know it's difficult.
I really just shake my head when someone says to me
"But you don't work, can you do it?"........
Or "Can't you make me a quilt by Friday?" ---and it's Wednesday.
Nice.
I work 100 hours a week as an entrepreneur compared to your 40 at the office.
Seriously.
WTF
"You're a stay-at-home mom, can't you do it?"
Love that one.
Yeah, I stay at home. It's a choice. I don't have the money I once did, but I'm way way wayyyyyy happier. I don't sit around eating bon bons, friends. I don't even have a television license-don't have any channels, I wouldn't be caught dead with daytime tele on. EwwwE. (No judgement if you're addicted to trash TV, lol.)
I read.
I work.
I make things.
I cook homemade meals.
I take care of my family.
And by the way, this is the case for most stay-at-home moms I know. We are busy bees. For real.
For reals, for reals.
Word up Moms. (or Mums) ;)
I think most people don't understand or realize how long it takes to make something.
Unless you craft/sew/DIY yourself, perhaps it doesn't occur to you at all, and that's okay.
But for those of us who've decided to make it our business, our hobby, and our lifestyle all wrapped into one little wonton---well, it matters. A lot.
So next time you balk at a craft show when the artist is asking £30 for a table runner, take a care friend. Take a moment to reflect the hours invested in that piece of work. Think of how he/she took time away from the family to honor the craftsmanship involved, because if it were easy, everyone would do it.
(Dusting off hands).
Time to focus on the future.
I've got to finish special requests made by my little ones, like this Sponge Bob quilt:
And bags to carry all my stuff in:
And possibly a quilt for myself, gasp---yes, for me.
It's time to travel as well, to see new sights and breathe new air.
passport holders
Time to pick flowers and notice the itty bitty things.
Is that really a Wildabeast, oh my...smh.
Time to say "yes" to friends' BBQ's and get togethers. I'm sure by now I risk having no friends left, as I always say "I'm so sorry, I'm working.".........but I really really was (working).
Gotta get my things in line.
Prioritize.
I knew stuff was all wrong when I couldn't locate a file on my computer that was to be published by a magazine.......Umm.....super dumb. (On my part.)
Get it together, Hippie.
So I am, starting----- now.
If you feel me, if you know what I'm talking about, give me a holler.
I appreciate it when people let me know I'm not the only one.
Here's to making yourself/your family/your interests first in line.
Let's do it.
(And not feel guilty about it.)
word. You go girl. love the pic with the tea and pink car ;)
ReplyDelete;) Thanks girly--and I wish that car was life size, I' d SO drive it. lol
DeleteLove you lady! Thank you for all the pieces you've made me. I love and appreciate them all! :)
ReplyDeleteI'm so understanding this, I don't have kiddies at home now, mine are grown up (not yet mature Ha). I do have a grandson I love spending time with. Enjoy your girls while you can, make spongebob, bake cakes do housework, make meals and enjoy every spare minute you have :)
ReplyDeleteJan x
BTW..... can you make a quilt by Friday,,,,,, a double????!!!!! :)
hahahahaha Jan! :)
DeleteSo get it! Well done you, great post! Enjoy that cuppa ;)
ReplyDeleteOH oh OH , Who is selling table runners for only £35. I will have two! It takes blood sweat and tears for me to pull together to start a project. Then the fun bit comes with measuring and measuring and then A bit more measuring before I cut into the precious fabric that cost HOW MUCH! a metre. Before I supply new needles and pricey thread, batting and backing. You are so right if I had a £1 for every person who thinks that I can whip up a king sized quilt in 3 days for £50 I could but the new sewing machine that I want without even flinching at the £2500 price tag. of cousre the machine that i would use for that £50 quilt would cost nothing to buy and maintain!
ReplyDeleteI work part-time, run a home, scratch cook meals, am there before my daughter goes to school & when she gets home.....I love it that way!! I admire you for fitting in what you've been doing for so long - now it's maybe time to pause, breathe & take time for YOU!! I am so behind you Natalie - being a mother is full-time hard work if you're a real mother...,, working 40 hrs in an office? Nah.....you havn't got time to cook, spend time with your weenies & you are probably unhappy - I wouldn't have my life any other way. You go for it, I am just pleased that I found you by chance, love what you made for me & admire your capacity to have made so many people happy by working hours on something. Some folk will never appreciate how MUCH time goes into home-made items, but I DO. ♥♥ Natalie, your time is now xxxx Catherine :))
ReplyDelete♥♥♥ I'm so glad I found you too Catherine! Have fun in sunny FL! :D :D :D
DeleteYou are so right! Me not looking for a job since we moved to Spain may be the best decision we made the past 2 years. I am home the entire summer, ready to spend time with my son when he wants to (but he's 12, so these occasions are getting rare), I am home to help him with his homework and I am home when my husband isn't working, which is on a very irregular basis so if I had a job, it would be possible that I wouldn't see him for 2 to 3 weeks on end...
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, there is less money to spend, but we don't have to spend it on daycare or a second car or lunch at the office or whatever and what we get in return is so much more precious...
Now, let me get back to my sewing!
You hit it on the head Wendy, exactly right...now get back to your machine and make something loverrrrrly. ;) x
DeleteSo proud of u for this post. At home mom is the most demanding job...because you can't just leave and come back fresh the next day. And same goes for your sewing...its always there, tantalizing you right? Even those who work can take away from this...work is work and family( and friends) are way more important. I'm trying so hard to start now with, when I go back to work (next week!!!!!:(((() nothing comes home with me. And yes, hand crafted stuff is way more precious and hard work...which is why od buy it than try to make it!;) you go girl. Xoxox
ReplyDeleteNEXT week?!!! :( No bueno. No me gusta.
DeleteI feel ya! When hubby and I made the decision that I'd stay home it seemed like everyone we knew who had little kids decided that I could babysit. All. The. Time. because I "didn't have anything to do all day". I was taking care of three kids, 2 dogs, a house, and usually (since he worked closer) taking hubby a home cooked dinner every night. Not to mention trying to help care for a parent with a terminal illness. Finally hubby started answering the phone and telling people "I'm sorry, she can't do it she is already doing something that day." I had a big problem with saying no, especially to family. He protected me from myself and gave me back a little breathing room.
ReplyDeleteStick to your guns with making what you want and need a priority. You won't regret it for a second and don't feel guilty! :D
I hear you Samantha, sometimes we need husbands to stand up for us when we feel guilty for doing so--I totally get it. Happens a lot, the difficulty of saying "no". Sigh. ;)
DeleteYou are absolutely right. I detest the phrase "You're a stay-at-home mom, can't you do it?" Ick. I love your work and would gladly shell out some serious cash if I were still in your area Do you ship to Alaska? (you can say no) You are awesome don't let anyone make you feel otherwise.
ReplyDelete;) Thank you for this Jayme. :) I'd want to hand deliver your quilt as I long to see Alaska!! :D
DeleteAMEN sistah. I had a lady once say, "I was talking to my husband the other day and I said, I wonder what J____ does that keeps her SO busy..." It was very pointed and snarky, so I responded, "Get back to me when your 2 little ones are a little older". I had 4 children at home of varying ages and to be honest, I didn't want to hang out chatting with people when I had my own family whose company I enjoy.
ReplyDeleteYou are amazingly talented and creative- it should never become a chore or something you dread. Enjoy your summer!!
For real, I'm learning to say yes to those who are worthy of spending time with, instead of people who are--snarky. Yup. ;) xx
DeleteYes, yes, yes! I so understand what you are talking about! I have 5 children under 10, I homecook and look after the home and my work usually happens in ALL the available spaces in between that. (like those hours between 9pm and midnight)I am learning to say no to things, gradually - because I am learning that when I overstretch myself, I get stressed and it impacts on the family. When you have your own business making things, you are constantly at work, even those last moments before you go to sleep. I haven't watched TV for months and months and I worry every day about whether I am investing in the right things. Alongside all of that, my boys remain my priority, but it's a very hard one....when the 3 fancy dress costumes for school need making and so does your latest commission! I appreciate so much when someone like you says it how it is. Thank you x
ReplyDeleteExactly. I hear ya! :D Glad you understand, and super glad I'm not alone in this. Thank you.
DeleteI really don't know how you do it - all those quilts and the kids and you aren't rocking in a corner yet going crazy, you must have magic powers :-) Have a fab fab holiday full of fun and adventures, I will give you a shout if we venture to that open door charity shop. xxx
ReplyDeleteMuahahahaha magical powers--you must have them too! :D C u soon.
DeleteBrilliant post, just found you via Lisa at The Fernery on FB. Sarah xo
ReplyDeleteBrilliant post, and I totally get it!! I have closed my books and locked my workshop for the summer holiday weeks, as I didnt want to feel torn, and didnt want to not enjoy time with my kids because I was stressed about working. Enjoy!!!
ReplyDeleteGrrrrrrreeeeaaaattttt Post! you go girl.. :D
ReplyDeleteDeeDee--"great" like Tony the Tiger?!! (Hope I didn't just datemyself there...) :D :D :D :D Thanks for your support sistalady.
Deleteamen sista! i feel ya!
ReplyDeleteWhoop whoop hollla! :D :D
DeleteAs a stay at home mum of 4 I HEAR YOU and back all you say :) love this post. hugs
ReplyDeleteHugs back at ya Sharon :D xx
DeleteI admire your willingness and courage to be vulnerable, to show up and engage with the people who matter most. Some of us are in it with you looking at you with eyes full of support and admiration and love of your work...and some of us are outside looking in with the eyes of judgement. Just forget about looking outward and making anyone else looking in your yardstick. You seem to know what's best for you and those you love (who love and support you), so stay engaged and do what you need to do. No more apologies or explanations necessary. Enjoy every moment of whatever path you have chosen for now. I hope you'll keep us posted. I'd love to see the Sponge Bob quilt and the one you're making for yourself!
ReplyDeleteI'll definitely post the quilts! Feeling so lovely right now, really happy in this journey. Thank you for lovely comment Kate. Stop back soon ♥
DeleteI love this post. So honest and real. I chose to be a full time stay at home mum for the past 16 years and I don't regret a minute of it.
ReplyDeleteSure less money but I'll never get that chance to spend time with my kids being little ever again.
Enjoy your family, put them first and don't worry about anyone else. I too am making a quilt just for me at the moment.Everyone has said who's that for? and I happily reply, it's just for me !! Therese.
Thank you Therese, I will remember your comment and persevere with my new agenda of "my family and I first"...............nothing else really matters (that much). ;)
DeleteWell, I look forward to what you are doing this summer with the girls. They are lucky that you are so interested in so many things. What fun is ahead! One of your boxes will be on it's way today! Love, love forever, Grammy
ReplyDelete:D
DeleteI completely feel this, every stitch, every homecooked meal, every Wildebeest on the .... nevermind
ReplyDeleteLOL! ♥
DeleteHolla! so so true....myyyy pet peeve is people asking me to drop everything and hem their trousers or replace a zip! Sorry if I dont jump at the chance...err but I prefer making new beautiful things than fixing fiddly ones...And I am working a ft day job as well...hence my sad 1 to 2 week posts on my site lol...Always an inspiration - will be back again soon!
ReplyDeleteCraftyGirlUK
Well there are only 24 hrs in a day Joy, so don't sweat it. We'll wait on you to post again! :D :D xx
DeleteI just started a home business sewing various items, and I completely understand where you are coming from. People have zero concept of how long things take. I have to fight the urge not to pay myself for my time because I feel guilty charging what something is really worth. Your work is awesome, I am lucky enough to have two pieces by you that I treasure. I hope you have a superb rest of the summer with the people who matter.
ReplyDelete{hugs} Lauren, you rock! :D
DeleteLove you lovely lady. Never be afraid to say "no" it means you are saying "yes" to something else....i.e. yourself, your kids, your hubby, your art ..... or just "yes" to the time to sit and be... we are always so go go go and then wonder why everyone is so pent up, exhausted, frustrated and short with one another. Self love must come first in order to love those around us and at the end of the day....it's our loved ones we want to be remembered by and cherished... not someone we were sloggin our guts out for to make happy who forgets us the minute they walk away. I use to feel guilty for taking time for myself. Now when I enjoy down time for me or my family I am that much more grateful to see the beauty in the world and the gifts God has given me.. it makes that time that much more special. Sorry for my rant, just know you and your work are loved ~ keep doing what works for you !!! much love!
ReplyDeleteThank you for this Jessica. It means so much to me. You are one of the most positive people I've met, and I am so glad for that. ♥♥ Much love right back at ya lady.
Delete